extemporally | This entry brought to you by late afternoon blahs.

So I was talking to

forochel and it was pretty good! We talked about being gay and coming out and the Straits Times and other things, and I started talking about columnists I hated, and my least favourite kind of columns. Specifically those of the "men are from Mars, and women are from Venus" kind. And I said this:

"idk. usually it turns out, like: so women are neater/tidier/smarter/more put together than men (wink wink). but men are funny! I, a man, am funny! I am writing this column about how women are better and it's not sexist at all! but women are sooo uptight!"

So, you know, screw that shit. Let me put this another way: sometimes I am funny. Sometimes I am not! Sometimes I fail to see the inherent humour in something -- you know, you'll watch a video or look at a ridiculous picture and you'll be like, "Oh, this is okay," until someone's like "... PINK SOCKS. PINK SOCKS." and then you realise that pink socks are pretty ridiculous and funny! That's not just me, right? The Internet just makes things funnier some days!

But my point is. Fangirls are the funniest people I know, and we don't have to prove anything, but you should tell me a joke. Yes?

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We are indeed HILARIOUS. As evidenced by all the hilarimazing dialogue in the stories we write.

But joke! Well, true story, anyhow. So a rubber connotes different things to British people and American people, right? When my brother was in first grade in the US, a mean kid in his class kept stealing his eraser, and my mom, being schooled in British English, wrote a note that said, "Jordan keeps stealing E's rubber and it makes him very sad." OOOPSIES. A very precocious first grader, my brother.

HEE. Oh man, I am going to have to watch out for that some day! Sometimes I can't tell the difference between British and American English, and I use the terms interchangeably.

I think the best part of that was it makes him very sad. YOU STOLE MY CONDOM. :( :( ♥

My two favorite jokes - highlight for answer!

What is brown and sticky? A stick!

What is green and fuzzy and if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table!

People re-hashing the same old gender stereotypes = not my idea of a good time. "Oh, and hey, while we're at it - women are bad drivers, too! But that's okay, because men can't ask for directions!"

Um...okay, this is my family's favourite joke, and it is appalling, but we are all a bunch of dorks.

Why don't seagulls fly over bays? (scroll over for answers)
'Cause then they'd be bay-gulls! (Say it outloud...)

Also: What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck!

Clearly we like our puns.

Personally, I think that I'm hilarious. Unfortunately, no one else does. (I'm one of those lame-os who says something and then laughs for like 10 minutes by herself.)

There was this really elaborate and really, really filthy joke I used to tell at school about a nun and a taxi driver, but I cannot for the life of me remember it.

I got sent out of a history class at college once after the dude next to me told me a really stupid not-even-joke in the middle of a lecture about Mussolini: A strawberry and an orange are sitting in a bubble bath. The strawberry says, "Could you pass the soap?" and the orange says, "I can't, I haven't got any arms!"

I cracked up because it was so rubbish and was made to stand in the hall for being disruptive. (I was 18, I might add.)

The other really stupid one I love is the interrupting starfish.

you: Knock knock.
them: Who's there?
you: Interrupting starfish.
them: Interrupting starfish wh-- *interrupted by you smooshing your palm into their face.*

I don't have any jokes for you, but I do want to say you're awesome. :D

INTERRUPTING STARFISH INTERRUPTING STARFISH. Amazing. I AM GOING TO TRY THIS OUT DURING THE WEEKEND. If people yell at me I'm going to blame you.

Also, y. I cannot tell you the NUMBER of times I have started telling some funny story ("funny" story, whatever) only to start giggling and disrupt myself. Meanwhile everyone waiting goes, like, "... :|".

FOR EXAMPLE, once I went to the toilet and heard the sound of water, and thought it was someone pissing really loudly. Then I realised it was raining. When I tried telling people about this particular moment of geniousity, I couldn't, because I was cracking up way too hard.

why do you ask, two dogs fucking?

I don't know! Why? :D

Gosh, thank you! Late reply, but when I first received this comment it made my day a little bit. You're awesome for that, and for other things too. ♥

I WILL LAUGH VERY LOUDLY BB. It is not hard at all to get me to laugh at you!

Also, DOPEY FUCKED A PENGUIN. You're now officially my favourite. :D

Yeah, I know! :| :| :| Also the whole "hurr hurr hurr" that comes along with it, the implicit WELL OF COURSE THESE ARE GENERALISATIONS NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY ALSO MOSTLY TRUE. Yeah, ok. Shut that noise.

You're such a dork and I love it. :DDDDDDD

BAY-GULL. BAY-GULL.

omg, these are the best. :DDDD

(Also, your icon. &DORKS;)

I LOVE THAT YOU FLAWLESSLY LINKED THAT BACK TO FIGURE SKATING. THAT'S IT. WE'RE OFFICIALLY DONE.

ELENA I AM ON 750WORDS.COM AND IT'S AN AWESOME INCENTIVE AND I AM WRITING MORE THAN 750 WORDS OF AN ORIGINAL FIC AND :DDDD YAY WRITING

YAY! WHAT IS THIS SITE?

WHY ARE YOU NOT AVAILABLE TO CHAT? I WANT TO TALK TO YOOOOOUUUUU!

I don't even know, man. Cute graphics are apparently all that're needed to make me write -- which, ahahahahahahaha oh man.

I am on now! WHEREFORE ARE YOU NOT.

This is my other favorite joke. My best friend and I do this one all the time. The interrupting starfish joke from down the page reminded me!

Also, I adoooore them. And it seemed appropriate. :D

This entry brought to you by late afternoon blahs.

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